Cuba's Letters to the World
by Weapon Frayer
Summary: Cuba's finally opened up, and is answering your letters! Whatever your needs, concerns, or questions are, such as importing fruit, giving advice about relationships, or beating up America (or Canada, accidentally), you can count on him for his reaction! Read the first chapter for info on letters.
1. Note for Readers

**A/N:**

**Hey guys! I have decided to start a letter fic, but since the 1000+ chapter 'Switzerland's Letters To The World' had to stop, due to site rules, and the fact that I can't find their forum, I'll start one myself.**

**However, the rules:**

**1. I will start a forum shortly after posting this, so you guys can ask there. I will NOT take letters via review, due to the 'Switzerland' fic having to stop for that same reason. If any of you would like to help, feel free to. Just don't post letters here in the reviews.**

**2. On the forum, don't spam/flame/troll, or you will be off of there real fast. **

**3. Please, please, please under any circumstances, go crying off to me about your letter not getting posted. Trust me, I will try to get to as many as I can.**

**4. Letters via PM will be accepted; please don't spam or flame.**

**Anyways, as the title implies, Cuba is the one you can ask for answers, advice, help, or help getting revenge on America! Hope you enjoy!**

_**UPDATE:**_**(8:30 CST, 4/23)**

**Because I can't post links, here's the instructions for finding the forum:**

**1. Go to my profile.**

**2. Click on the bold and italic link near the top of the page.**

**3. See 'ya there!**


	2. Intro

**I'm beginning the letters, starting with this:**

* * *

Dear World,

Hello! I'm Cuba, and I got this idea from Canada, and Switzerland. Too bad he lost his memories...they were really funny!

But anyways, thanks to Canada, I'm doing the letter business. If you need me to beat up America, give advice, humiliate America, give the Russian guy thanks, beat up America, or tell you about my opinions, I'm in!

See 'ya, mon!

Signed off,

The Republic of Cuba


	3. Fuzzball1

**1st letter!**

* * *

Dear Cuba,

What made you not like America, I mean get that he can be annoying and sometimes cocky, but what first struck you about him?

Sincerely,

Fuzzball6846

* * *

Dear fuzzball6846,

Heelo! I'm Cuba, and this is my first time doing this!

Anyways, originally, back in 1898, we were on good relations because America freed us from Spain's weakened grasp; then, in 1961, America was planning to invade Cuba, with some Cuban militants, all because I had an alliance with Russia. Then, there was the Cuban Missile Crisis, in which America the bastard insulted me and my country in almost every way! Anyways, we got into a political argument, and then we got into a fight. We beat each other up, and I threatened the bastard with nuclear weapons. That shut him up!

The thing is, I used to admire America, back in the day before the World Wars. Then, some guy gave the bastard a hamburger during one of America's World Fairs in Chicago, and the rest is history.

With warm and sunny regards,

Cuba


	4. Norway1

Dear Cuba,

What would you do if America beat up your best friend? Without violence, what would you do?

With regards,

Lukas Bondevik (Norway)

* * *

Dear Norway,

If the bastard beat up Canada...I swear I would beat him up...

However, the best thing to do without violence, is to yell at him, and use psychological warfare, like Mr. Russia's Symphony back in 1944...something like that.

Anything that has to with Russia, socialism, or anyone attacking his country, like Pearl Harbor, or the Burning of Washington, America will be crying in his little emo corner... :)

Sincerely,

Cuba


	5. Nikki1

Dear Cuba,

Would you get mad if America stole the ice cream that you just gave Canada? Because I just saw America running away from Canada holding ice cream, and laughing while Canada was sulking.

Thanks!

Nikki

P.S.

If that was your ice cream you gave Canada, can you beat him up senseless for me also?

* * *

Dear Nikki,

WHAT THE HELL! THAT BASTARD TOOK CANADA'S ICE CREAM, THAT I GAVE HIM! *gets into a rage*

*cracks fists* Oh, that bastard is going to pay... *darkly grins*

I know all of the secrets of the haircurls, ever since Hungary showed me after my request...

*maniacally laughs* The bastard is going to pay...

With thanks,

Republic of Cuba

P.S.

THAT F**KING ICE CREAM WAS CANADA'S! I KNOW I SAID IT BEFORE, BUT I GAVE IT TO HIM!

The bastard's gonna get beat up~ *smiles weirdly with creepy grin*


	6. Update

**Dear World,**

**I'm aware of the letters that you guys send me, and I have a request: If you're going to correspond with me, can you keep up with it, and maybe keep regular contact?**

**It would save me a lot of hassle, and lots 'o other stuff.**

**With warm regards,**

**Cuba**

* * *

**Hey guys, it's me: the author.**

**As Cuba was saying, please keep up with your correspondence, and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ONLY one character writing a letter per method (e.g forum writing, PM).**

**Thanks guys!**

**~Weapon Frayer**


	7. Seychelles1

Dear Cuba,

How was it like being raised by Spain and America? I was raised by France and England and everything about me, from facial features to skin color and so on is European.

One thing I bet you never had to deal with is England's wedgie magic.

Sincerely,

Seychelles

* * *

Dear Seychelles,

Well, Spain was (mostly) nice. Although he did accidentally kill most of my native population, he taught me a whole lot of stuff. I also inherited his love for sherbet (it's just like ice cream, but even sweeter!)...

America...he was also nice, but then, I decided, just like he did back in 1776, that I wanted to decide my own path. Well mon, that was a bad choice, cuz the Cold War was going on, and America was thinking he was the policeman of the world. I regret my decision, cuz the incident that resulted coulda' resulted in the destruction of humanity.

The only thing (actually things) I had to deal with was all of Spain's colonies, Romano, America's obnoxiousness, and so forth. Lucky you.

With warm regards (and some ice cream),

Cuba


	8. Seychelles2

Dear Cuba,

Lucky me indeed. I was never involved in anything big like that, and my colonizers mostly ignored me. At least you're independent now though.

You're also lucky that that's what you inherited from Spain. I inherited lots of habits from France, and oftentimes they've gotten me in trouble.

Sincerely,

Seychelles

* * *

Dear Seychelles,

Well, at least you're isolated; I'm wedged between my damn older brother Mexico, and the bastard! Aren't you already independent (officially)?

Really? Like what? (He tries to rape me every 4 years with Spain!)

With warm regards,

Cuba


End file.
